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Showing posts with label strange. Show all posts
Showing posts with label strange. Show all posts

Tuesday, 30 June 2009

Coming out part 2 & TMI Tuesday #193

1. How many speeding tickets have you had? Accidents?
None, i don't drive.

2. Boxers, briefs or commando?
None, girly pants please.

3. Have you ever had sex in your office or your place of employment?
Yes, but i wasn't working at the time. J and i work in the cinema and we get two free tickets each a week, and she went down on me while we were watching confessions of a shopaholic. The film was crap so we needed some extra entertainment :)

4. Do you or your so own a motorcycle? Do you ever ride one? Do you wear a helmet when you ride?
No, but my ex had one so i have been on one. Only once or twice though, and i did wear a helmet.

5. Ever been skinny dipping?
Loads of times! Its essential in this heat.

Bonus: Ever been arrested? Turned someone in/had someone arrested?
Nopes




Coming out part 2

On Sunday night Moby played in Malta (and Deadmau5, for anyone who might know of him). Unmissable, obviously. I went with T and some of her friends, and spent most of the day at her house beforehand. We had a taxi coming at 8pm and planned to get steaming drunk before, so we opened a bottle of rose at 3.30pm before the others arrived. At about 7pm we opened a bottle of vodka and poured half of it into a plastic bottle and topped it up with orange juice. We met the taxi, piled in and continued drinking till we got there, and then on the way down, somehow the topic turned to J and my sexuality. I can't seem to keep my mouth shut when i'm drunk.

T told me she'd guessed from facebook and twitter (emerging pattern! i always thought we were quite subtle on facebook!) and that she'd asked her dad and Sue who works with us what they thought (ohhh the awkwardness). She also said that my brother mentioned to her that i'd slept with J and that she was waiting for me to tell her myself. She then said that she got a bit offended that i took so long to tell her cos she is my best friend after all. To which i replied that i was really scared she'd act differently towards me and she said as if she would, i'm her best friend, her big sister and she loves me no matter what. Then the conversation got a bit weird.

T said she would never have imagined me to be gay and that she didn't think J looked like my type, from facebook. She thinks she looks too butch for me! Not that there's anything wrong with butch, but J isn't really butch at all, and in my drunken state i started squealing in her defense. T then went on another weird road, where she said she's worried about me being in a relationship with a girl cos she doesn't want me to hurt her. Fair enough. She said what if i'm not sure what if i'm not sure if i'm gay or not and decide that i'm not and then break her heart? I said we've been together for 8 months, if i had wanted cock it would've happened by now. She argued that i still fancy men (which i do) so how can i be sure? It was all rather strange, i wish it hadn't had happened when we were both fucked but at least it's done and she's acting exactly the same as before. I do worry that she won't like J though, which will kill me. She's added J on facebook though, so that's a plus.

J had said, before i'd told more of my friends, that she was worried that they wouldn't like me, but now that they know we're together she's even more worried. I told H this the other day and she said if i like her than they're bound to like her too. I love that girl. So we'll have to wait and see.

I can't wait to see her now. It's been almost three weeks and because she's never been in Malta with me, it also feels as if my relationship with her is just a dream, it almost doesn't feel real anymore. I really can. Not. Wait. Roll on July and Beni!

Monday, 23 March 2009

The strangeness and confusingness of it all

I'm in a frustrated mood. I cried a lot yesterday and a bit today, and I haven't cried in ages because I've been so happy recently. And then I lose my temper, and even though she's acting normal, there's just something a bit off. We do spend a lot of time together, and fair enough she's spending the evening with her best mate, but I don't know when I'm going to see her, plus we've only spent one proper day together in ages. It's just that I'm going home in a week, and just before yesterday things were brilliant. But anyway I'm just making a fuss. She annoyed me because about a month ago I asked her if she wanted to come with me to dinner for my friend's birthday, and she very obvioulsy didn't want to but said she would, because obviously I want her there. A couple of weeks ago I told her I was going to book the night off work and she told me to book hers off too, so I did. Then yesterday she got annoyed cos she has less hours cos she has the Saturday off. Why do people do that? Why did she tell me she'd come with me when she didn't really want to? But anyway...

I still find it strange that I'm so in love with her. Everytime I see her smile my heart literally skips a beat, and whenever we're not together I can't stop thinking about her. Like now. Considering I'd never had feelings for another woman before it still feels a bit surreal when I think about it. And usually things are amazing between us, the cheesy annoying kind of great where you just stare at each other and smile like a twat.

I really wish she was staying over tonight.