The trouble with boobs

I am a pretty confident person, and generally i'm very happy with my body. The only problem is my boobs. My boobs are massive, they've always been big for my age, i was a C cup at 11, but now they're big for anyone's age. I'm an english size 30J (which i just checked, you'd be surprised how hard it is to find bra size conversions, is an american 30M), and one of my boobs is twice the size of Baby Boy's 5 and a half month old head. I only own one bra in 30J, i wear 34G bras only because all the bras made in the very big sizes look like kites plus they don't really suit 19 year olds. At least i don't think so.

I have back problems because of them. My lower back hurts if i bend down and carry heavy things, especially heavy shopping. The centre of my back constantly aches and if i lie, stand or sit straight up it aches even more. I have to sleep curled up otherwise i'll hardly be able to move when i get out of bed. J complains sometimes because i curl up when i sleep cos that doesn't give her much space when we sleep in my single bed at halls. I explain to her that i can't help it and she understands that there isn't anything i can do it about.

A few months ago i went to one of the GPs at the university to see what i had to do to get a breast reduction on the NHS (ie. for free, im a student, i can't afford to pay for one). The doctor told me he'd refer me to the physiotherapy department at the local hospital and i'd have to undergo a full treatment of physio, to see if they can help my back problems. He said that if they couldn't helo me i'd then have to see a psychologist to see if my boobs were causing me psychological distress, then they's have to analyse my body to make sure they're 'out of place' on my body (doesn't take a genius to notice that - i'm 5'2", my hips are 31-32" and my waist is 30, whilst my boobs must be about 38").

This was in October, before J and i even met, and the referral didn't come till December. I went for my first session a week before i came home for christmas, and the woman who saw me that day seemed in favour of the surgery. She mentioned a friend of hers, who's in her 50s, recently had hers reduced and she wishes she had done ti when she was younger. Anyway, she asked me about my back pain, where it was, how it was aggravated, how bad it was etc. Just before i left she told em she was too busy so i would start seeing another physio, her name's Abi, she's young and so she can relate to me. She also gave me some exercises to do, and sent me on my way. I saw her once just before i went home and she told me to crack my back and buy a gym ball to use cos i needed to work on my glutenous muscles (or something, basically my ass muscles).

So over christmas i cracked my back, because that actually felt good, but i didn't do any of the exercises cos obviously i didn't want the exercises to work, cos then all this would've been for nothing. I went back after christmas and Abi told me the exercises had worked cos she could feel a difference in my muscles (wtf?? i didn't actually do anything hello!!). So she sent me away with even more exercises which i didn't plan to do. After i saw her 2 or 3 more times she told me she was leaving and i'd be transferred to yet another physio. So two weeks later i went back and the latest physio asked me what i had been told to do. I told her i cracked my back and i was given exercises to work my muscles. She told me that doing that is probably making the back pain worse (brilliant!) so all she told me to do was make sure i sleep curled up (which i did already, plus i thought that made it worse anyway, stretching the muscles even more?? who knows) and she told me to try sleeping on the floor, ie. put my mattress on the floor. Err, what? I was getting so much conflicting advice, and for a 19 year old living in a foreign country with no parents there to guide me, i had no idea what to do. So i didn't do anything.

My next appointment was two weeks later and i completely forgot about it, so i haven't been since then. A private operation costs at least £5000, so i'm just going to have to go back to a GP and explain the physio situation. Hopefully i'll be able to get it done with just a GP, psychologist and surgeon reference. As if those three weren't enough!

This is me a couple of days ago, ignore the bulging belly, just look at the boobs lol.


This is H and me on New Year's Eve. I loved that dress, except for the fact that boobs kept threatening to escape.


And finally this is me when I was 15, I was already a 32G then.


I'm used to the extra attention they give me now, men shouting things at me on the street, bus drivers scaring the life out of me by honking their fucking horns when i walk past them. It doesn't happen so much in England, but it always happens in Malta. I was teased at school, but i was quite a hard nut and gave as good as i got. Or just ignored it. The favourite was sofa (my name's Sophie) and cushions. Anyway, fingers crossed, when i go back i'll find a doctor who can make it easy for me.

Also, here are some blogs that i've found interesting, they're about breast reductions.

http://thereductionquest.blogspot.com/
http://messageboards.makemeheal.com/weblog.php?w=349

Obviously there are many more, but these are the only ones that really got me reading.